So Much Time Gone By. . .

So much time has elapsed since my last blog entry that I actually forgot how to log into this thing again!

What to say? My little newborn is now one year and 17 days old. He is a funny, chatty, expressive little wonder. And I wonder daily what I ever did to deserve this amazing (and amazingly blond) little babe. (Said his dark-haired mother.)

I did finally get three job offers. I turned down the "big" job with a fat paycheck, fancy title and big office in downtown Chicago in favor of working 3-4 days per week for a consulting firm where I can continue to work from home. I think it was a great decision. I have a nanny now on my working days, but see my son often during my work day and never feel like I've missed something important. And my job doesn't own my life. I still own it.

Working more frequently while caring for a baby has been a big adjustment, but we are in a much better financial place now. So, much better than last Christmas when we were broke and I used my holiday gift cards on diapers and formula and prayed at Christmas that I would keep finding ways to scrimp, sell or earn in order to cover the mortgage.

Nevertheless, with our new-found income, we have continued to be pretty frugal. Paying down debt accumulated in leaner times and hitting the yard/garage sales like crazy this past summer. I'm still amazed at how well I can do buying lots of things second hand (baby stuff especially). Better financially and better for the environment. A real win-win.

We are still living in that little, sometimes drafty, almost 90-year-old house in Chicago. I'm still thinking of replacing the kitchen floor and redoing the downstairs bathroom and, lately, with a crawling-trying-to-walk baby around, thinking of getting the hardwoods covered with less injurious carpet. But none of the above has been done. My frugal nature insists that I get rid of remaining debt before incurring new costs. So, new kitchen floor and living room carpet in 2010? We'll see.

Craze and I are still going strong. Next June marks 10 years of togetherness. For a guy who seemed to have no interest in kids, he has proved to be a committed, funny and tender dad, who never shirks a diaper change and loves nothing better than the sound of his son's laugh and his beaming little face.

Our animal family is still here, too. Bug, who is mostly terrified of kids, loves Henry. She is so very good with him. The formerly-stinky-big-headed-foster-dog who became our dog is still here, too. He is, however, the most expensive dog of all time (at least in our experience) because of his hip issues and previous leg break (was hit by a car years before we adopted him), but we love him and he loves us and now, at least, I'm actually making some money to pay for his care. And who needs a beach vacation when instead you've got a 70-lb golden haired boyfriend who likes to try and sit in your lap most days? And the Alley Cat and Grey round out that little pack. Both are purring along, soft and sleek and lovable as ever.

I am still heavy. Yeah, I lost the baby weight, but was pretty big to begin with and it's all still there. I'm the frumpiest I've ever been, but mostly zen about it all. On a whim, I had a bunch of my long hair cut off a couple months ago into an impossibly high-maintenance hair cut that made me look like a scarecrow if I didn't straighten it daily. The bleach blond peek-a-boo highlights didn't help. Needless to say, I looked like a scarecrow post-cut most days. Thankfully, two months of growth and a ten-minute hair color session has made me look more presentable (no more peek-aboo!) and I'm looking forward to more hair (along with other changes) in 2010.

I joined Weight Watchers just before Thanksgiving and have lost 5.4 lbs in five weeks. Not bad considering this has included Thanksgiving, baby bday party (and homemade chocolate cake!) and run-up to Christmas. And frankly, while it would be nice to break out of the frump rut, I am more committed to just being in better shape. I would love nothing better than to be able to sit on the floor and play with my son and get up from said floor with ease. It's the "ease" part that I need to work on and Weight Watchers is a first step in that direction.

Not to mention, I have a cute, thin husband who still manages to love me even though I look pretty awful most days lately. Looking and feeling better certainly couldn't hurt in the relationship department.

And like myself, my house is sort of frumpy, too. Aside from the old, chipped kitchen floor, crummy downstairs loo and lack of living room carpet, the onslaught of baby toys and gear has made our clutter issues seem so much worse (and I think caring for a little one has made it a lot easier for the clutter to pile up and stay piled up). My wish for 2010 is that I can streamline myself and my stuff and make my home more livable and easy to clean/maintain in order. It's time for a big purge, all around.

All that said, 2009 was a financially stressful year and the lack of sleep from 7+ months of night-time feedings/baby not sleeping through the night made it harder. But at the same time, it was really an amazing, pivotal year in my life. Having birthed my babe last December, 2009 is the year when I really became a mother in caring for that little boy every single day. It has been the most amazing gift of my life. And even with no money coming in and sitting up for those 4 am feedings, I remember sitting in the dark in his room and reminding myself to cherish every moment. And I think I will remember those middle-of-the-night hours spent nursing and quietly singing to him, looking outside at the snow quietly falling or the shadows on the wall, wondering what this little person would grow to be, for the rest of my life.

And I have an overwhelming sense of gratitude. That my child is healthy and happy, tall and bright. That we still have a warm, cozy roof over our heads. That we find a reason to laugh at least once a day. That I have met new people who shine a light into my life through their own faith and selflessness. That I have founds ways to give back to others who have less.

So, I guess really 2009 was more about riches than anything. I may be frumpy, but I'm sort of fantastic as well. And I guess that's pretty great.

Working Mama Maggie?

I actually have a job interview on Tuesday. Not just any interview. . .a breakfast meeting. . .FANCY!

We'll see what happens. I'm in two minds about the whole thing. On one hand, I'm excited about the prospect of making good money again (pay off the credit cards and not have to worry every month about how to pay the mortgage!) and having interesting work to do. On the other hand, I'm not relishing going back to the daily downtown commute and being away from my baby during the day.

Clearly these are issues that most working moms have and find ways to overcome, but it just seems SO hard. Couple that with the fact that at five months, I have never left baby Henry with anyone but my husband and you have a mom with serious separation anxiety. I feel sad about being away from my little babe.

What to do?

I'm hoping I can work part-time three or four days a week (and if four days, maybe one day working from home). That would make the whole thing more do-able for me. More palatable.

I miss my baby already (and he's only in the next room taking a nap!).

Aside from that, this work-from-home-for-the-past-four-years-often-in-my-PJs woman needs to tart herself up for Tuesday. This afternoon sees a haircut. I already colored my grey, grey roots a couple of days ago. Next, I need to figure out what the hell I'm going to wear!!!!

PTL!

It was happened! Fingers crossed, the jobless wasteland of the past 12 months is beginning to evaporate.

Last week, I got a call about not just one long-term job, but TWO. AND I got some consulting work to boot. Not a ton, but enough hours to pay a good chunk of my mortgage this month. Hallelujah!

It still remains to be seen if either of the potential long-term jobs will really materialize, but I'm excited that things seem to be turning a corner.

Maggie's Trying to Get Greener!

I'm excited about Earth Day. I'm reminded of even more things I can do to help the planet and create a better world for my little child.

I encourage you all to look for ways to be greener, too. Recycle, obviously, but there are so many simple and fun things you can do. Plant some veggies in your garden or containers. I'm planting herbs, tomatoes, peppers, lettuce and maybe some snap peas, too. Mend something or get something repaired instead of buying new. I LOVE mending things! I really do feel great when I've put something back in order or given new life to something that otherwise might have been discarded. It makes me feel useful and clever.

Buy used instead of new. This is fun and saves money as well as the environment. Many of my babies clothes, toys and baby "stuff" have been purchased on craigslist or at yard sales for a pittance compared to the price of new and most just require a good washing or two to be good as new.

Use fabric napkins and dish towels instead of paper ones at home. I had tons of fabric napkins I never used until about two years ago when I decided to use them for meals instead of paper ones. I'm sure I've saved a lot of money and a good bit of landfill space.

We don't buy plastic poop bags to pick up after the dogs any more. It suddenly occurred to me last year that I was discarding perfectly good "poop" bags in the form of plastic bags that I get with loaves of bread, produce, etc. Now when they are empty, we just fold them in a drawer with the dogs' leashes, ready to pull out for the next dog walk.

I'm thinking of cutting up old laundry detergent containers to make some colorful planters this year (cut off the top and put holes in the bottom for drainage). I think I'm also going to make the move from disposable diapers to washable, re-useable ones. The modern ones look really easy to use and will really save us money over the next few years while Henry is still in diapers. I feel guilty every time I stick a disposable diaper in the trash and that's something I can change.

Hope you join me in trying to get greener!

Surprising Reconnections

This past week has been somewhat amazing in the reconnection department. Not only have I found one, but two old friends. One, my best friend from the ages of 4-8, found me on Google and now she's coming for a visit in June. I'm so excited! We lived next door to one another and I can't remember my mom ever having a better friend than my childhood friend's mom. We went to kindergarten together, caught butterflies, egged each other on to see who could eat the most sour gooseberries from the bush in the garden, listened to "I Think I Love You" one too many times and watched Speed Racer every afternoon. Such happy memories of carefree days!

The other found-again friend is a kooky guy from college who I lost touch with years ago. My friend Joan and I have often wondered what became of him and finally I was able to track him down through a friend of a friend on Facebook. He's still living in California where I last heard from him and, thankfully, doing well. He's hanging out with celebs on occasion in the swanky LA hotel where he works as the hired muscle should any security be required.

And if two reconnections weren't enough, I'm actually having lunch with a third old friend, this one from junior high, this Friday. She was my friend for only a short time until we had a falling out over religion (how 13-year-olds fall out over religion is sort of beyond me now). I think it all happened when she fell into the grip of an evangelical group and started telling me I was going to hell for this, that and the other thing. Even at 13, that was enough for me! Anyway, she tracked me down on Facebook and told me I was one of the best friends she ever had--which to me was quite surprising, though nice of her to say.

She had an unfortunate accident several years ago and is now confined to a wheelchair which is very sad for one so young. Also, Ms. Right-Wing Christian now practices Islam--if you can believe it!

Anyway, I didn't have a burning urge to see her, but she wanted to see me and meet Henry, so it felt like the right thing to do.

How is it that sometimes just when it feels like the world is getting smaller and smaller, something happens and a new world of possibilities seems to open up. I feel like that's happening now. For a while now, my circle of friends has been diminishing but now old friends are reappearing in unexpected ways. And it feels nice.

It makes me happy.

Too Tight for Tea and the Sea Creature Next Door

Ahh sweet mother. . .there is nothing better than a piping hot cup of latte in the morning. Even my own, cobbled together with non-espresso coffee and microwaved milk. Delish!

A friend from out of town is in town and I met her and another "friend" (acquaintance now, really) for tea at the Four Seasons on Friday afternoon. While I do love high tea, it was hard to enjoy it because I knew it's really just too expensive a thing for me to be doing right now. Over fifty bucks including downtown parking, for teeny sandwiches and cookies just slightly bigger than your thumbprint. Kooky, really.

But what's done is done and I must try not to live in perpetual financial regret.

Today we're actually meeting these same friends for lunch. This time Craze is coming and we're going to an Indian buffet, so hopefully we can both have a good meal without doing too much financial damage. I really do look forward to eating out nowadays since it's been relegated to the "not now, maybe later" list of things we put off until the day when we have more household income.

I have a call with a company next Friday about some consulting work (it got postponed from last week). I'm really crossing my fingers that they need help. Oh, how I want to work and bring in the cash again. I do not enjoy being SO cash strapped.

In other news, my gypsy (and I mean REAL gypsies!) next door neighbor, just got colored contact lenses that make her look crazy. She is very olive skinned with dark, dark eyes but suddenly now has light, aquamarine eyes that make her look like the love child of the Man from Atlantis and some kind of Sci Fi Channel creature. Weird! So weird in fact, that it's hard not to look at her face without staring at those crazy eyes. How can she possibly think this is a good look for her?

I'm dumbfounded, really. The other thing I find surprising is that she's an unmarried mother of three with no job who lives (and has always lived) with her parents. How can she justify the expense of colored contact lenses when her parents are supporting her and her three kids? Grandma is a waitress at a local diner and grandpa has not one but two blue collar jobs to support all of them (plus their 30-something son who also never works).

I guess if I remind myself that Ms. Crazy Eyes is the same woman who I regularly saw outside smoking last summer throughout the duration of her third pregnancy, I shouldn't be very surprised. . .

But still I am. . .

The older I get the more I realize that people and their behaviors are a never-ending mystery.

The Magic of Neosporin

Okay, a little warning: My post today might seem somewhat gross, but I have to share. Here goes. . .

Ever get one of those things in your nose, like a scratch or cut that just won't heal. Often after a bad cold and clearly made worse by winter's dry air? Well, I had such a spot just inside my left nostril for months. MONTHS I tell you. Three at least, maybe four. Every time I'd move my face in a certain way or wriggle my nose, I'd feel it. Uncomfortable. Abnormal.

I tried saline spray to keep the area moist. Didn't help. Figured time would heal. Still, nothing.

Then I had to go to the dermatologist recently for an odd-looking mole and while in the office, I hit him with my nasal issue. Peering inside my nose with a light and a little wooden stick, he said, "Have you tried putting Neosporin on it?"

Huh. . .no. Indeed I had not.

Well, it was like a little miracle in a tube. Two applications of generic triple antibiotic ointment with a Q-tip over a 2-3 day period and my little problem is completely healed. COMPLETELY HEALED. After 3-4 months of waiting for it to heal otherwise and feeling the daily discomfort of this annoying nasal thing all I needed was a couple little dabs of neosporin. Wow. I really am amazed.

Now I'm wondering. . .do you think it will have the same affect if I just sort of smear it on other parts of my face or body every now and again. Beginnings of crow's feet. Bam! Baby-making stretch marks. Pow! Come on Neosporin. Do your best!